Already There...

August 4th will never be just another day for me as long as God gives me breath. August 4, 1990 changed my view of that date forever. Isn't it amazing how that happens? You go through life never noticing a particular date, but then a baby is born, you begin your life with your soul-mate, God chooses to take a loved one Home... and that date is forever changed.

August 4, 1990 could be viewed several ways for me, and it has been. It was on that day at 3:30 in the afternoon that fire claimed my one-year old daughter's life. I wasn't home. A neighbor came to where I worked and drove me home with barely any explanation as to what the emergency was. Approaching my home, I saw flashing lights from ambulances and fire trucks. And then a lady in white wrapped her arm over my shoulders and explained that the firefighters did all they could, but my daughter didn't make it. Her little lungs couldn't withstand smoke inhalation.

It was horrible-- beyond horrible. A day that is forever engraved in the memories of my soul.

Of course I grieved my loss; I still grieve at times. But then I found an unexpected emotion, jealousy. My baby, Mindi, was in heaven! My ultimate goal-- my ultimate reward. She didn't lose her life, she received it!! I wanted to be there, too! Then, only by the miraculous grace of our God Almighty, JOY flooded my soul. What more could I want for my precious baby girl than a life of perfect peace, joy unspeakable, in the presence of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit hearing blissful angelic voices singing, "Holy, holy, holy". And then to know that this life is nothing but a vapor (James 4:14), but ETERNITY is the time I'll have with Mindi.

If you have lost a child, whether you made the choice to abort an unborn child or God, in His perfect wisdom that is so much higher than we can ever comprehend, chose for your child to live with Him early in his/her life, please know that there is a peace that passes all understanding. It comes only from above. Surrender your life, your grief, your anger, your resentment to God. I can't say it will be easy, most likely it won't. It took me eight years to fully surrender my grieving heart to Him. And I still weep, I still long for time I've missed, I still wonder what Mindi would look like as an eighteen year old young woman... BUT I know God's grace is sufficient... (2 Cor. 12:9) He's proven it time and time again.

Let me encourage you today, friend. Dig into the Word and see where your child is, what your child sees daily!! It's not the horrendous newscasts we see and hear. It's not hopeless devastation. It's tearless eyes, painless bodies, cemetery-less fields, no hospitals, no cancer, no glasses, no crutches, no hearing aids, no tangles in her hair, no war... no migraines!!!

Check out these Scriptures:

• Isaiah 25:8 -- "He will swallow up death forever, And the Lord God will wipe away tears from all faces."


• Isaiah 57:1-2 -- "The righteous perishes, and no man takes it to heart; Merciful men are taken away, while no one considers That the righteous is taken away from evil. He shall enter into peace; They shall rest in their beds, Each one walking in his uprightness."


• 2 Corinthians 5:1&8 -- "For we know that if our earthly house, this tent, is destroyed, we have a building from God, a house not made with hands, eternal in the heavens... We are confident, yes, well pleased rather to be absent from the body and to be present with the Lord."


• Revelation 21:21-25 -- "The twelve gates were twelve pearls: each individual gate was of one pearl. And the street of the city was pure gold, like transparent glass. But I saw no temple in it, for the Lord God Almighty and the Lamb are its temple. The city had no need of the sun or of the moon to shine in it, for the glory of God illuminated it The Lamb is its light... Its gates shall not be shut at all by day (there shall be no night there).

Remember that peace, no matter the trial, can only come from the Lord. "You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You, Because he trusts in You. Trust in the Lord forever... the Lord is everlasting strength." (Isaiah 26:3-4)

So, this brings me to prompt you to check your soul's condition. Are you ready to meet Jesus? Will your children see you enter the gates of Heaven? Oh, my friend, grieving the loss of a child is nothing compared to losing your soul forever-- never making Heaven your eternal home.

Surrender to Him. Here's how:

"Jesus said to him, 'I am the way the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.'" (John 14:6)

"If you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. For with the heart one believes unto righteousness, and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation... For 'whoever calls on the name of the Lord shall be saved.'" (Romans 10:9-13)

Finally, we need to remember that we'll never understand why. It's all right to ask, but don't expect to understand. We just have to trust in God's infinite wisdom (Proverbs 3:5-6).

Let me leave you with a verse I quote often; it was in my Blogger Debut post, it's taped to my computer monitor... a promise I lean on. "When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; And through the rivers, they shall not overflow you. When you walk through the fire, you shall not be burned, nor shall the flame scorch you. For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior." (Isaiah 43:2-3)

You see, this promise comforts me -- There's nothing too big for God. AND He made sure that my baby didn't feel the fire... She was already There.